Thursday, March 3, 2011

The Value of a Friend

I love my family. They are amazing. They have always been supportive and stood by me.  Hugs and love were never in short supply in our household. 

Because I have such an amazing family and support system, I never really made an effort to have friends nor did I think it was a big deal that I lacked any friendships. Well, now, I have found the importance of having girlfriends. Not only that, I have finally learned how to be a good friend.  I know that sounds ridiculous but you have to understand, I didn’t have many friends.  I attribute this to being part of a Navy family.  I think this factor is part of what kept our family so close.  Also due to this factor, I never really made solid friendships.  They weren’t that important to me. When you are little you make friends but you don’t really learn how to maintain a friendship until later on in life…probably starting in junior high.
By the time I was in Jr. High I knew that we would be moving by the time I got into high school. I had friends but no one whom I have remained in contact – even in the weeks after I moved, I didn’t talk to any of them.  I had my family, what else could I possibly need?
We lived in Texas for my first year of high school.  That’s it. One year. 
We moved out here to Florida. I went to and finished high school at one small-ish school in North Florida. I don’t talk to anyone from high school either haha.  With the technologies of the internet and social networking, I have been able to be VERY nosy with regards to my high school peers as they have been able to be with me and my life (thanks FB!).  I don’t mind…we were what I considered friends. 
Real Quick Side Note: I am a low maintenance friend -- I don't need to hang out with you every day to consider you a good friend. I LOVE spending time with The Husband and my friends need to understand that. They need understand (or at least respect) that sometimes we just want to sit at home and spend time together as a couple. I don't have to go shopping with you all the time or drinks on the town once a week to be your friend.  I require very little -- don't judge me, love me and laugh at my lame jokes. J 

I left home to go to college, and still had no idea how to be a friend to someone who wasn’t related to me.  All I needed was my family – that was my mentality.  Then I met Krissy – probably my first REAL friend.
It was the summer of 2003 and we were in band camp together. J She has never once judged me for anything. She has been a great friend to me…even when we lost touch for about 2.5 years.  Thanks to FB, when I graduated from college, I happened to stumble across a picture of her and found that she had an FB account.  Now three years later, we try to have lunch at least 3 times a month and it is like we never missed a day. J She honored me by agreeing to be a bridesmaid in our wedding almost a year ago.
Along with my dear friend Krissy, I have found myself among a group of young women who are inspiring and beautiful. 
They have also helped teach me the value of a great support group of women who love and respect me.  We have had girl’s dinners, a girl’s weekend and lots of girl talks during our various get togethers (with and without our significant others). 
It is no secret that I struggle with The Husband being out of town for work. We spend so much time together and talk constantly. This has been hard on us, but we have this wonderful support system in our friends to take care of us as individuals and as a couple.
He will be home tonight FINALLY – last night/yesterday was a bit of a rough day for me. I’m not going to lie, I looked at my post from yesterday several times because it at least made me feel warm and fuzzy.  Thank goodness we had planned for a girl's dinner last night – the laughs were constant and the company was amazing.
I wouldn’t have changed anything about the home or circumstances under which I grew up and lived, it helped mold me into the person I am, with strong family values and lots of love to give.  I am so thankful for the family I have, and now I have my other family J 
These girls have helped me with struggles and celebrated with me in ‘victories’ I love these girls. They are strong and beautiful.  They have helped me to be more positive and set aside differences I have had with other people and helped me to build better relationships where the first impression wasn’t the best.
J  Because of my relationships with these women – I have learned how to maintain friendships and relationships.

Family is important – they love you and support you. I hope every girl has been fortunate enough to have their second family
à their ‘sisters’ J 


Emily said...

Such a sweet post :) Where in North FL did you go to HS? I grew up in North FL, in Orange Park-south of Jacksonville. I will take no offense if that is where you were!

B F said...

Amen sister! I have an amazing family, husband, and of course my two little besties (my girls) that I live for, spend all my time with, etc. BUT I couldn't live without my besties. I love our dinner dates, nights on the town, or just spending time at home with our kids, shopping, etc. Girlfriends are the best! And I'm glad you found some great ones!!

Christina said...

I heart your face MF! Life is much better with you and those other lovely ladies! Yay for John coming home tonight!! BIG YAY!!! :)

Unknown said...

It's funny, for a lot of my life, I was more comfortable with males as friends (I have no idea why). It was in college that I started to get the concept of "sisters", and I have the most wonderful gang of women at work ... we go out, we laugh, we send lame e-mails to each other, and we in general keep each other sane while trying to teach middle schoolers. Don't know what I would do without them! Thanks for reminding me :-)

Sam W. said...

what a sweet post. girlfriends are so important, married or not. i'm so happy you have a wonderful family AND friend group!

Michelle (michabella) said...

Aw what a blessing to have a group of ladies like them! I have never had a close relationship with many girl friends. Lately it has been very hard on me! But so happy for you! And yay for the hubby coming home :)

Unknown said...

Such a sweet post! I didn't find my real girlfriends nor did I learn how to be a good friend either until after I got married and we made many friends as couples. I think a lot of people go through that. Have a great Thursday! xoxo

Unknown said...

Awesome post!

I have a lot of girlfriend. All of my bridesmaids are girlfriends I went to High school with. However, three of them we weren't very close in High school. Make sense?

I VERRY much believe in friendships and believe that every person [lady] needs a night out with the girls. A girlfriend can understand and relate to things a man can not. Even though I tell Aaron everything, he may not respond to me or get on the same level as my ladies. I love balancing all my girlfriends. Each one of them are different and make life more special in differnt ways.
When you have children, you will love having them around because there is nothing more exciting than to watch your girlfriend raise her children.
The Movie, Life as we know it, Is a perfect example. I do not have children, however am a BIG part of my girlfriends kids and it's truly amazing!
I can't imaging having to make friends and leave them due to a Navy life. However, you only know how you've been brought up.

SOOOOO very happy that I have YOU as a blogger friend. Because YOU are just awesome!

Unknown said...

This is so cute! I love posts like this. Talking about our loved ones and friends, getting all mushy. Always makes me remember how much we need to apprciate everyone in our life! <3
Love my PW girls!!!

Unknown said...

Most importantly, YAAAAAAY for your hubby coming home tonight!

Unknown said...

I REALLY hoping NO ONE reads "I have a lot of girlfriends" wrong. I was in the middle of answering phones and dealing with customers... Sorry! Don't think I have a BIG head.

This is my last time commenting, I swear! ha!

Allison said...

I love this post. Ryan and I used to do everything with me...even things my girlfriends would be glad to do, but I'd just rather have him there (i.e. Taylor Swift concerts). When he left, I thought oh man, I'm not going to have anyone but my true friends really pulled through for me. They're so important in the small things.

I'm glad that you have friends who are there on the not so good days for dinner dates, phone calls and pick me ups.

I can relate on not having your husband there. It's tough, it's hard when they come and then they go (or sometimes in my case vise versa). It's hard having them there for a few days or nights and then the emptiness of the bed at night or coming home and spending an evening alone.

If you ever need a pick me up or a funny joke (even though mine are kind of lame) let me know! :D:D:D

Pink Champagne, Gatorade, and MRE's said...

such a sweet post!

Anonymous said...

good friends are hard to find!

Unknown said...

what a fabulous post :) i so agree with everything you said! xoxo girlfriends= amazing!

d.a.r. said...

This is such a great post!!! I have always seemed to find only the kind of friends that stab you in the back or are totally fake. It started changing once I got out of college and I am so blessed and grateful. Quality is so much better than quantity!!