Nothing Is What It Seems

Facebook is a funny thing...especially for those of us who moved during grade school. I wasn't huge into FB when it started with college students only. I had an account and I wasn't hugely active. It wasn't really my thing.

Later in college, I started to find the value in it - especially in sharing with my out of town family. I got sucked in and friended all sorts of people from grade school -- seriously from like elementary. So weird! As my college chapter came to a close, I started accepting friend requests (and making my own) from people I went to high school with. I liked high school OK but I didn't make friends that I have stayed in contact with over the last - sheesh...I hate to even say this....9 years! OH MY GOSH!!! How did THAT happen?! I have been out of high school almost TEN YEARS?! Somehow that makes me feel strangely old. =/

Anyway, all the ideas of who you were or who someone else was, fades. You talk to people who thought you were a somebody - that freaked me out the first time. I would NEVER say I was popular. I played sports and knew a lot of people but I didn't have a crowd. It seriously changed every year. So for a "popular" kid to tell me I was popular - weird.

Yesterday I was surfing around and looking at different pictures and I stumbled upon a guy I had a little crush on my freshman year of high school when I lived in Texas. I never told him - he was older and I thought WAY out of my league. Ha that is so funny to think now...I mean come on - really?! a LEAGUE?! We were 13-17 for crying out loud!! So I ended up clicking on his profile. He is a good looking MAN - also weird to think. He will always be the 16 year old I knew and hung out with  =) So I checked what he is up to now; you know where he works, married, kids, etc.  It is always so interesting to me to see where people end up. He isn't where I thought he would be but I only knew him for a year and I was a kid =)

So here I am thinking about being 14 and what I thought I would be doing 10+ years later. I'm no where near where I thought I would be -- and not because I had serious expectations about my life, but I thought I would always move somewhere that ACTUALLY had seasons; or live a glamorous life; or have 3 dogs; the ideas I had about my older self were strange lol.

I knew at the end of my freshman year that my family would be moving to Florida and I would start my new life in high school there. But I had no idea I would end up being a stationary individual. I always thought I would move every few years. I guess I have TECHNICALLY but I haven't left the city I came to for college.

I always thought I would live near my parents - which I do.

I thought when I was 22-23 I would have my first kid. Thank goodness THAT didn't happen - I wasn't quite with the man I call my husband until I was halfway into my 23rd year but prior to officially dating him, I had a couple terrible boyfriends.

I thought I would be a stay at home mom - Heaven knows that would kill me. I would NOT be productive if I stayed home all day all the time.

I never EVER would have thought I would have married such a Southern boy with redneck tendencies. Let's face it - my man is a hunting-fish catching-meat eating-camo wearing- SOUTHERN man! I guess I always thought I would end up with someone that had an office job as opposed to the man I have married, self-employed (until this year) and just all around different than I would have ever imagined.

I got excited about a giant turkey I saw when I was driving around with my mom for crying out loud!

If you would have told me that even when I was 20 I would have laughed in your face.

Life is so funny the way it works out.  I know I have said this in the past, but there is not a SINGLE thing I would change, I wouldn't reverse a decision or go right instead of left. I'm exactly where I want to be. =)  And it isn't to say my life isn't glamorous - but to you, it probably isn't. My most cherished moments of my recent past, are the hours I am snuggled in bed with The Husband talking and laughing about our every day love and life. I say my life is glamorous; maybe not in the traditional sense but to me, it is. =)

It is so fun to see where people have ended up...it is also LOADS of fun to look up boys I had crushes on in jr. high and see what they are doing now and what they look like =) Yes in a very FB stalking manner - whatever! don't judge - I know you do it too =)

Are you where you thought you would be?
What is surprising about where you have ended up?

My Cup Runneth Over

I believe I am allergic to life - my eyes get all red and watery at nearly the drop of a hat.

I've decided I am allergic to the following (but not limited to):

proposals

weddings

sweet parent/child commercials

loving commercials

happy movies

sad movies

Heck I am even allergic to someone getting hurt.

Seriously - I was watching the FSU game this weekend with the Husband and got choked up. SERIOUSLY?! during football?! I don't even care about Oklahoma OR FSU. For those of you who didn't see, an FSU receiver was knocked unconscious at the goal line during the first half of the game. I seriously got choked up watching the medical staff place him on a stretcher and take him out of the stadium. For those of you who care, he did come back to the stadium on his own, out of uniform to watch the rest of the game.

I can't figure out when I became allergic to so many things. I think it all started right after J proposed to me. Before, I was emotional when the time was appropriate but now I feel like it is ALL. THE. TIME. I was watching an old Friends episode a couple weeks ago and BURST into tears. LITERALLY. No I am not pregnant...that is usually the first thing I am asked at work by the women I work with.

I'm not really sure what has happened in the last two and a half years - but I am way more prone to crying than I ever have been. I cry when I am happy, mad, sad, frustrated, excited...it really is bordering on ridiculous! I don't know how to make it stop!! I mean, I have always been one to feel better after a good cry, but I feel like I am getting all teary eyed about nothing. Gosh - at least before, there was purpose to my emotions. Now I feel like I am on the crazy train and someone else is driving haha!

In other news - some things are being restructured at work which is why I haven't been able to comment on all your lovely little blogs. Between work changes and us prepping to move and all the DIY stuff we are getting into, it is seemingly never ending. We are excited to start packing up some of the stuff this weekend and getting a handful of projects finished.

You should see my list of DIY projects and list of things to buy. It is getting out of hand. I am slowly coming to the sad realization that I won't be able to do all of the things I want by the time we move in, but at least now I have some organization going on with all of it. I can't wait to share everything with you =)

Have you found that you are more emotional since you got engaged/married?
How do you deal with it?! =)

Hello Monday!

Hello Again!

I can't believe the weekend is ALREADY over!

I miss my blog =/ here's the thing though - I can't just write about nothing =/ i don't particularly care to ramble on and on about just whatever comes to mind.

Since we are saving as much as we can and only making purchases for the new house until we close, we aren't living very exciting....OK we aren't living very blog-worthy lives! haha! I know that is silly but we spend a LOT of time in our bedroom.  That is THE only room that stays cool since our A/C went out over a month ago. I can honestly say I don't know how we have managed for the past month.  Unfortunately, because our room is so small, the only place to hang out is on the bed. That seems great but I'm to the point now where the bed isn't comfortable to me any more and NOW I am having a hard time sleeping =(

Thankfully there appears to be an end to the madness...we are anxiously awaiting our closing date that we should be receiving in about 2 weeks with the approval letter. Our realtor said that the closing date will be within 30 days of the letter. SO we are looking at around the end of October at the latest...fingers crossed lol! For those of you wondering WHY we have waited so long, it is because we are buying a short sale property.  In the reality of it all - we are actually very fortunate to be moving along in the process so quickly.  I know, 3-4 months to close on a house does NOT seem fast but it IS for a short sale.

The Husband and I did walk around Ikea for a couple hours on Saturday. That was fun - if nothing else we came up with some new ideas for the house. We designed a couple of the rooms and additional furniture pieces.  We had a really great time together but once we got in the truck, we started seeing dollar signs. We have a plan to be able to get a lot of the stuff we want before or once we move in. Hopefully everything stays right on track.

While we were out and about we tried a new restaurant.  It is on the other side of town from where we live, so we won't be frequenting the place but it was amazing. I know I will want to go next time we are on that side of town. It is a Mexican restaurant.

The service was wonderful, the food was phenomenal. I was so so happy =) I could also eat Mexican food everyday =)

We are planning a trip BACK to Old Time Pottery sometime after we move into the house SOOOO I may have to convince the Mr. to take me back there =) I have been thinking up all sorts of reasons to try and make it over to that restaurant haha! it was so yummy!!

I think that is really the only things going on right now for us. I hope to have a project posted tomorrow. We have lots that we have been working on and still lots more to come! I can't wait =)

Happy Monday!

Secrets, Surprises and Smiles...Oh My!

Last night, I walked into a house smelling delicious. There was something cooking.  The Husband cooked for me and it was ready to eat when I walked in the door!! He made potatoes Au-gratin and baked cream cheese stuffed chicken. Can we say 'YUM'?! I was so impressed and overwhelmed. He really is incredible. The man made me dinner and cleaned up before I had gotten home from work! I'm seriously a lucky lady =)

We have been living on our own (together) for four years now. I am honestly shocked at that revelation. I always worried that when I lived alone with someone, conversation would eventually be forced. I mean what in the world could we talk about every single day?! It wasn't just J that I worried about this -- I always worried that conversation would run out with whomever I was with. We don't have that problem - we always have something to talk about =)

We still manage to surprise one another and plan little happiness-es whenever possible - whether it is as simple as picking up the other person's favorite treat on the way home or cooking a new recipe and having it ready when the other person gets home.

We share secrets and laughter. We spend time in bed when we get home from work and we talk about our day. We eliminate the world for a few moments, just so we have no other distractions. We constantly discuss the upcoming move and our plans for the house. We continue to discuss the design and layouts of the rooms. We talk about the floor -- where one type should stop and the next stop. We talk about the upcoming holidays and whether we want to begin a new tradition at the new house. We discuss the future both tomorrow and years from now.

I am sure it is nauseating to some how often J and I talk or that we would rather spend time together than anything else. We are very affectionate and we cuddle - a lot. as in, all. the. time.  Even when we sleep! We just can't get enough of each other. Even though we have taken some heat from friends who have harassed us for our constant displays of affection, I hope the feelings we have never goes away.

Have you ever come home to a cooked meal and a clean house?
What does your significant other like to do to surprise you?

What I Have Learned

Today marks a mere eleven days until my sister gets married. She will walk down the aisle as a single woman and come back holding the hand of her new husband. Watching her go through these past few weeks leading up to the moment that family start arriving and all you can do is wait, has got me thinking about the last sixteen months of my life.

That's right people -- I have been somebody's wife for a smidge more than sixteen months. It is strange to think that I have not always wore a wedding band with pride, that I wasn't always his wife. 

I have learned so many things about who I was before and the person I have become in a few short months.

I have learned lots of good things about myself; I have become a really good cook. I'm an incredible baker. I have learned how to make J laugh. I have learned how to love unconditionally. I have learned to look at the brighter side of a situation.

I learned that I was selfish...I was so sure that I was already living for us and our relationship before we took the plunge and said "I do". I have learned that wasn't necessarily the case.
I was selfish. I hate to say that about myself because I like to think I wasn't. I was -- big time. I think I realized that about myself about a month into our marriage. I can't remember what the exact moment was or what was going on but I remember stopping in my tracks because at that moment I wasn't concerned with us, I was concerned with how whatever it was would effect me. It wasn't something conscious, it was there, underneath it all. I had no idea.

It was during that moment that I adjusted my way of thinking. I had to figure out how to put aside the 'all-about-me' mentality. It needed to be about what was best for us and our future as well as our present. We had to learn from our past -- both in our relationship to that point and past relationships. 

I think a lot of my selfishness was bred. I was raised to be thoughtful and courteous and caring. I have found that I dated a lot of guys, some of whom taught me about my own strength and others who expected me to be a different person. Sometimes it was for their family, sometimes it was for their friends and still, other times it was for the guy I was with and what he expected from a significant other.
When the last big relationship I had before J ended, I promised myself I wouldn't compromise the person I am or my values and I certainly wouldn't change. If someone didn't love me for exactly who I am, well that was just tough and I would move on. I held on to that pretty tightly. I didn't want to lose myself again in the person I was with - even if it meant losing that person.

I held fast to me -- I learned quickly that I tend to be slightly offensive. OOPS! Where other guys and their friends have told me it was me being a b!tch, J explained that some people just weren't use to my way of thinking or how outspoken I was. Well that made more sense. I wasn't going to change - just wear a different proverbial hat, if you will, when interacting with certain people.
I use to hate to admit that I did that -- wore different faces for different people. But in reality, you have to, for the most part. You act differently with your co-workers, friends and family. That's just the way it is -- then within those groups you have a different 'hat' for different circles.

I have always, and still, struggle with that. We are all so encouraged to be the person we are, yet we are expected to act a certain way based on the climate. I struggle -- I have an opinion on pretty much everything but I am not necessarily diplomatic in the way I present it. I feel like honesty really is the best policy on all things. I have learned to better convey ideas, especially if they are contrasting to the originator's idea.

I have learned that I need affection all the time. I really like hugs and I am not afraid to tell my friends and family that I love them. I do love them -- my friends have become an extension of my family. My family consists of the most important people in my life.

I have learned that I want to be accepted and loved. I know most people feel that way - but I use to try to convince myself that I didn't care. There has been an incident recently-ish that I have found myself a target of sorts. I am really unsure how it all came about or why I had been singled out but it was really hurtful. It happened and I have moved on -- my big thing is WHY. That's all I want to know. I had a similar situation happen in college. I thought this girl was my best friend. We lived together for three years and there aren't many pictures I have from college that she is not in. This still hurts me because I came home one day from visiting my parents and she had just moved out. No note, no notice, nothing. She hasn't spoken to me since. That was like 4 years ago -- she has since gotten married, I have gotten married. I have emailed her and tried to talk to her on facebook but I have never gotten a response. I just don't know what happened -- all of a sudden she was gone.

Wow -- sometimes writing it down, helps so much. I was feeling all misty and teary at the beginning of this post, trying to figure out what was weighing on my heart. Apparently a lot of stuff that I needed to say out loud.

I can't believe my sister is getting married in a few short days -- July 30th. I am so ecstatic for her and  Douggles -- yeah I call him that (sounds like snuggles haha). I am just thrilled beyond belief for them and slightly envious of their upcoming honeymoon. *Sigh* How I would love to go on our honeymoon again!

Have you had an light-bulb-on-moments recently?

Staging a Home

Have you ever had to do this?  I don't mean to obsess about what is going on with us,...but I started last night. I took stuff off the walls. It was so weird. Not having crap on the walls makes the whole place look different; which I know is the point but it is surprising.  Maybe it is because there has always been stuff on the walls...J had stuff up when I moved in.  He had one room dedicated to Scarface stuff and posters and pictures.  He says the movie is a classic.  I fall asleep EVERY. TIME. I try to watch it. I don't find it that entertaining...in fact it is a little boring. Oh well -- he can have his man room in our next home and have all of it back on the walls.

They tell us to take all our personal items down, family pictures, knick knacks. It is supposed to help people come in and not be distracted by your things and be able to visualize their own stuff in the space. WHAT am I supposed to do with all our stuff that is supposed to be hidden?!

Thank GOODNESS we have family in the area.  We will be storing a good amount of our personal things and wall hangings at my parent's house.  Tonight I am going to spend a lot of time going through the craft room. I have to organize the space and de-clutter-fy it.

I'll post some before and after photos of the space.  You are going to be shocked and I am going to be a little ashamed as the room has become our 'catch-all' over the past couple months with everything else going on. I just haven't had time to be in there.

I have a puppy and ice-cream date with my Medium-Friend on Sunday that I am looking forward to. Saturday is going to be time with The Husband and probably more cleaning --woo. MAYBE we can take a lake break =)

Have a wonderful weekend! Happy Friday!

Sometimes Life Gets In The Way

Of EVERYTHING. At least this 'road block' is actually a good thing.  It is a step in the direction we want to go. 

I have been SO busy -- I got a promotion (Yay me!) So I have kept my head down at work getting into my new role.

We are also in the process of staging our home....that's right. We are selling our house. It scares the daylights out of me but I am so excited at the same time.  The agent is going to come by next week to take pictures and list the house.  SO that means I have to deep clean the house along with all the other things I need to get done this weekend.  I have no idea how I am going to fit it all in!! I will need help from J in a big way! We have to remove most of the person items from view and organize all the closets.  Have you ever looked at a home where someone was currently living?  You know you opened closets and cabinets.  So we have a lot of work to do in a short amount of time.

So if my posts over the next week plus lack a little substance or I don't post at all, please bear with me, Life is happening!

Have you seen this blog -- Ana White: Homemaker?!  It is amazing!! SHE is unbelievable!! She DIYs all kinds of furniture.  THEN she posts step by step instructions on what to do, what you will need and the estimated cost! I LOVE it! One of my co-workers introduced me to it.  They made the bed:  Instructions & Co-Worker/wife result

I have high hopes of making a few pieces for our next home. I can't wait!! I don't know how excited J will be when he sees the few I have already selected but I can do it myself if he isn't interested haha!  Here are the few projects I have selected:

DIY Filing Cabinet

Craft Table

Nightstand

This matches what J bought but he only bought 1 at the time lol

OR THIS nightstand -- it is cheaper lol BUT it won't match...unless I make 2....hmmm all the decisions!

 But like I said, before we can really get into any of this, we have to stage and sell our current home. First, we need to clean.  I have to figure out how to prioritize everything...invitations HAVE to be out by next week. Jewelry needs to be finished soon so I am not crunched for time.  I re-designed it and it is beautiful BUT now each piece will take longer to make.  I also wanted to make a dress for my cousin's wedding...that may have to be the very last thing I try to get done . =( that is SAD haha!

I am trying to keep up with all the blogging going on, but with everything else going on, something has to give and unfortunately it is blogland =( I will keep up as best as I can and hopefully get everything finished quickly.

In the meantime, check out Ana White -- she is a ROCKSTAR.  She also has a 'brag blog' where individuals who have used her design/instructions have posted pictures of THEIR results. Have fun!

PRAY in the meantime that I get everything done and can be back to 'normal' by next week =)
HAPPY FRIDAY EVE!

Life Isn't Always Skittles and Glitter + WILW

Good Morning and Happy Wednesday to all of you lovelies!!

First – Welcome to all my new followers!!! So glad you have found me and want to stay! I have enjoyed reading your blogs and getting to know you!

Second – I really feel I need to apologize for my lack of substance lately. We have been so busy with life in general. We are working hard to get on our feet and move in a forward direction.

We have come to some obstacles as of late…these obstacles have nothing to do with our relationship.

I don’t want to go into detail but I will tell you the absolute biggest piece of my life that is keeping it all together is our marriage. No matter what we have to come into contact with, I know we can make it through because we have each other and we support each other 100%.

It occurred to me on my drive home earlier this week, that at the end of the day, that is what is most important. All these things that are weighing me down and sending me into a pity party state are so inconsequential. We are approaching our obstacles hand in hand, on our feet and head on. It hasn’t been easy – they aren’t kidding when they say the first year of marriage is the hardest. That isn’t always necessarily to do with the relationship you have with your new spouse – it is all encompassing.

He is supportive and caring even when I am irrational (and I tend to be + overdramatic = possible meltdown lol) but he is there to hold my hand, give me a hug and talk me off the ledge…OK sometimes that means he laughs at me for being so over the top, but it helps me out =)

Along with my amazing husband who loves me unconditionally, I am fortunate to have strong family/friend unit. My family is my friends and my friends are my family – they become one in the same. Yes, of course, my ACTUAL family is different but each individual whether actual family or ‘extended’ family holds a special place in my heart.

When I look around and see the people in my life who love me and who will stick by me as long as I continue to be myself and the good person I attempt (and sometimes struggle) to be, they will be there. They will love and support me.

When we were making our guest list for the wedding, we started looking at the people who would be there for us, who would help us if we struggled – those were the people that we wanted there the most. The ones who supported us when we were just friends; then when we were dating; while we were engaged and then would support us in our commitment to one another. That is why during our ceremony we asked for the love, support and blessing of each person present at our wedding:
Two people in love do not live in isolation. The love between J and Ashley is a source of strength to each other and to the community around them. In turn, their community has a responsibility to support them. Do you who are present here today promise to surround J and Ashley in love, offering them celebration in times of joy and counsel in times of concern? If so, answer we do.

We are a strong couple together – we are a stronger couple because we have an unbelievable support system.

To my friends and family who read this – thank you so much for all of your love and support. Sometimes J and I need you to cheer us up, be our silver lining and help brush the dirt off. I promise, we will do the same for y'all =)

Since I won’t be going into detail about some of the trials we have had to deal with, I am going to share What I’m Loving Wednesday! Link up here!

I'm Loving...My Hot Super Amazing and Loving Husband

This is what he text me yesterday "I love you like crazy"
how cute is he?!

 

I'm Loving...My wonderful friends

*Not all pictured here

 

I'm Loving...My Parents and Sister

 

I'm Loving...That my birthday is in ONE WEEK!

 

I'm Loving...this new single from Blake Shelton Honey Bee

*I'm loving that he has short hair lol

 

I'm Loving... that it is Wednesday! and right now it is barely 60* out!!  That is so much more bearable than the 90* it was yesterday -- ick! haha

 

I'm Loving... these cupcakes I found over at My Life Unzipped!! How cute are they?!

I can't wait to try them -- she also posted a link for some Whiskey chocolate cupcakes with Bailey's frosting! I am so looking forward to trying these 2 new recipes!

 

I'm Loving...that I am getting back into a work out routine -- a little P90X + a splash of cardio = an emotionally stable and happy Ashley

 

Happy Halfway through the week Everyone! I hope you are having a great week and Wonderful Wednesday!

J & A Chronicles: A Year In Review

Seeing that it's the LAST DAY OF THE YEAR!!! I thought I would do a Year In Review with lots of pictures and less words =)

JANUARY

J took me to a Steelers @ Miami game for Christmas



Bachelorette Party

FEBRUARY

Strawberry Festival

A REALLY Bad 2nd Fitting

 MARCH

A REALLY Fabulous Final Fitting

Rehearsal and Rehearsal Dinner

♥ We Got Married! ♥

Husband & Wife

Went on Our Honeymoon

APRIL

I turned 25

 MAY

Jess & Doug graduated from ECU

JUNE



Redecorated craft room: before

Redecorated craft room: before



Redecorated craft room: after



Redecorated craft room: after

 JULY

Vacation with J's Parents

Asked to be a Bridesmaid in a Very Good Friend's Wedding
No these are NOT the dresses we are wearing -- I didn't want to spoil anything

Girl's Weekend

Vacation in the Keys with My Family

AUGUST

J's Brother's 25th birthday

 SEPTEMBER 

J's 27th Birthday

Dinner with some Friends at a New Hibatchi Place

OCTOBER

Halloween at Work

Halloween Party



NOVEMBER

My Little Sister Got Engaged and
Asked me to Be her Maid of Honor





Ran and completed my first half marathon



 DECEMBER

The Husband bought us a DSLR!

Had a Rock The Dress Shoot

 

Got our first Christmas Tree





Had Our 2nd Annual Christmas Party



Christmas Cookie Party

Christmas Eve Family Pictures



First Christmas as Husband & Wife



Christmas Day with J's Family

I know 2011 will bring lots of love and happiness within our circle of friends and family!  Happy New Year's Eve everyone -- be safe and have a great time ringing in the New Year!