Thursday, August 12, 2010

Love and Marriage

"Marriage, like everything good and important, isn't easy" -- Katherine Heigel 27 Dresses

So tomorrow marks 5 months of marriage for me and J! WOO HOO!! So far things have been amazing.
Don't get me wrong it hasn't been sunshine and rainbows for the past five months but we also haven't lost that 'honeymoon' stage.
Shortly after saying "I do", we had a big obstacle to conquer and overcome. It's been a bumpy road at times, already - we've stumbled through some of it and helped pick each other up on the other side.
It's hard disagreeing and not seeing eye to eye on something with your best friend. It's hard not understanding their perspective. I'm not saying we argue a lot by any means, but for us arguing at all is kind of out of the ordinary (it's sickening right? lol).
The days we have argued, are some of the saddest days but they always end in love, hugs, kisses, cuddles and we always apologize. The very best days are the ones filled with giggles and silliness. Sometimes Ruger doesn't understand we're laughing hysterically so he gets a little hysterical himself, and then the fun never ends.
Before we got married, J and I talked about lots of things from expectations to kids to finances to family to everyday life. We covered it all, and, shockingly enough, we agreed on most things.
I have learned a lot of things on the road from dating to marriage. Most importantly: it’s not easy-peasy, everything falls into place all the time.
I always tell people that “A marriage [or relationship] is like your house. You have to maintain it a little every day or it’s in a state of chaos by the end of the week.”
You have to make the effort all the time, even when you’re tired, run down, and just not up for the challenge. And it is a challenge. It’s the best, most beautiful challenge J and I have taken on. We love every single day together, regardless if it’s an easy day or not. Our worst day together is better than our best day without the other. We take care and support each other. We stroke the ego and are their best cheerleader and biggest fan. We make sure to spend time every day without the TV on just talking about our day and whatever is on our mind. Sometimes it is right after work relaxing on the bed and sometimes it’s while we are cooking dinner. We have learned to make time for just us, without the intrusion of the rest of the world. We compliment the other and still go on dates. Sometimes we do each other’s chores…I said SOMETIMES. I don’t do the yard lol.
We were both blessed with loving and affectionate parents who have taught us how to love and that it does take effort. We are fortunate to come from homes where we have a model for marriage. Of course ours will be different from their marriages but we come from the same ideals of what marriage is.
We don’t go to bed angry, sleep in separate rooms out of spite and we don’t attack the other. We always, always say “I love you”. Work hard and cherish your spouse.

1 comment:

Faith said...

what a beautiful post! i agree with everything you said. happy 6 month! can't believe how fast that went ... it feels like just a few days i had a PM and you were getting some advice for your wedding day. so happy for you and congrats!